Have you ever found yourself at a loss for words when asked a seemingly simple question about yourself, or felt uncertain about your true passions and desires? It’s a feeling many of us can relate to.
At times, you might feel confident in your sense of self, yet there are moments that remind you there’s always more to uncover about who you truly are.
If you are currently in this situation, it’s situation that many of us have experienced at least once in our lives. Knowing who you are takes effort and intentionality. Prioritise self-awareness to gain a clearer picture of your emotions, actions, and life’s desires.
If you are figuring out who you are, here are some of the things you can consider doing to better understand yourself.
Things To Do to Better Understand Oneself
Spend time reflecting
Sometimes life moves fast, and it’s easy to get lost from multiple tasks without pausing to check in with yourself. To improve your self-awareness, take some time to reflect.
What to do:
- Set a daily reflection habit: Spend 5–10 minutes at the end of the day asking, “What went well? What didn’t? How did I feel?”
- Start journalling: Having your thoughts written helps you better organise them and check some patterns over time.
Reflection doesn’t need to be complicated—just give yourself space to think about your feelings and experiences.
Be aware of your triggers
Have you ever experienced being annoyed by a certain action like someone cutting in line or a friend being late to an event? If so, take note of these triggers because sometimes they reveal something deeper about you.
Ask yourself these questions:
- “Why is this affecting me so much?”
- “Is this connected to a past experience?”
When you understand your triggers, it can help you easily identify your feelings and values. By doing so, you can have a more positive reaction toward them.
Understand and validate your emotions
Most of the time, your emotions can be valuable clues about what’s really happening inside. So, instead of ignoring them, take time to understand what they’re trying to tell you.
Ask yourself these questions:
- "What am I truly feeling right now?"
- "What could have triggered this emotion?"
- "What might this feeling be trying to tell me?"
If you are always feeling anxious about doing something you might need more preparation, or if you feel anxious all of a sudden, it could signal a need for connection or rest. It’s important to validate and identify where your emotions are coming from to help you handle them better.
Improve your inner voice
Your inner voice, the constant chatter in your head, can influence how you see yourself. Sometimes it’s supportive, but other times it can be overly critical.
How to have a better inner voice:
- Observe your negative thoughts and adjust your perspective.
- Replace “I’m terrible at this” with “I’m learning—it’s okay to make mistakes.”
- Swap “I can’t believe I failed” for “Everyone makes mistakes. I’ll try again.”
More often than not we need to be gentle and kind to yourself. This will help you grow and approach life with confidence.
Know your values
Values are the main center of your life’s beliefs which can also affect your actions and decision making. So, learn to identify your values and be certain about them.
How to understand your values:
- Think of all the things that bring you joy and satisfaction.
- Reflect on the things that make you upset. For example, if dishonesty frustrates you, it indicates that you deeply value honesty.
- Recall moments you’re most proud of—these often highlight your priorities.
Make your living align with your values to have a more meaningful and fulfilling life.
Have me time
In a world full of distractions, spending time alone can feel unusual, but it’s one of the best ways to connect with yourself.
What to try:
- Spend some time outside and take a solo walk while spending time with your thoughts.
- Find a quiet place and have your favourite beverage while reflecting.
- Do an activity you love, like painting, gardening, or reading, without interruptions.
When you’re alone, you can truly listen to yourself and discover what makes you happy or fulfilled.
Acknowledge and celebrate every win
Understanding yourself isn’t just about recognising what you need to work on, it’s also about celebrating your strengths and achievements.
How to celebrate:
- Recognise every victory, small or big. Make the celebration of every win a habit. It can be a simple celebration; it doesn’t need to be glamorous or expensive all the time.
- Reflect on what you’ve accomplished and what makes you unique.
Taking time to celebrate your wins helps build more confidence and serves as a reminder of your abilities and growth.
Getting to know yourself is a journey that takes time and patience. Be kind to yourself throughout the process, and remember that self-awareness is about progress, not perfection. If it feels overwhelming, start small and take baby steps toward understanding yourself. Embrace the journey without pressure, and allow yourself to enjoy each moment of self-discovery.
You’ve got this!